Delimit My Life

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing" ~ Hellen Keller

Archive for the tag “Mark Twain”

Day 19 I will not die an unlived life

While searching online for the fear of the unknown, I came across a short poem. The first line immediately grabbed my attention by its powerful language. I was struck frozen by the elegant word play so beautifully crafted. However, it was its essence that made me read it over and over, while it played and teased with my thoughts. I knew that only a person who has experience true hardship could have ever written such a powerful piece of work that strikes at the heart of its readers.

I will not die an unlived life.

I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire.

I choose to inhabit my days, to allow my living to open me, to make me less afraid, more accessible; to loosen my heart until it becomes a wing, a torch, a promise.

I choose to risk my significance, to live so that which came to me as seed goes to the next as blossom, and that which came to me as blossom, goes on as fruit.

~ Dawna Markova

Dying is a powerful fear but fading away is what truly scares people. Everyone dies, it is just a time and place, which is why I don’t fear it. It is enviable and therefore unstoppable. To me death is easy; it is what leads up to death that is hard. Life! I fear the resulting accumulated of my life rather than its ending. Some people fear dying alone, being forgotten by history, leaving no family legacy, wishing they had done more, however these all stem from the same root. No one wants to end up with regrets in how they lived their life.

This is the realization that explodes out of the poem. We all live one life, and we have but to choose to live it to its full potential. Through the failures that smack us down to the successes that carry us up, we have a choice to stop living in fear. We are all so powerful and unique yet many remain afraid, thinking of themselves as unworthy, to become successful in life.

For me, the most thought provoking line, “I choose to risk my significance”, makes my mind twist and turn at the unwanted meaning. Amazing, how the poem has me debating myself causing turmoil to my held beliefs. But, I have learn to question everything even thoughts I believed to be true. My fear is that when I die I will be forgotten (4). I want to make an impact, to be remembered. However Dawna, so significantly states, could live without this, being happy as a stepping stone for others and helping them progress along life. This raises a question that should be ask by everyone. What is consider a fulfilled life? Maybe, for me, that of a successful man, a loving husband, a caring father, a heroic citizen, a renown scientist, or a simple man, it is a question for which I do not have an answer yet.

There is one thing for sure, I will not die an unlived life!


Day 10 A New Cold Shower

Today was my first day in my new place which meant trying out the new shower. First, let me say, that all of the showers that I have used have one knob that turns in one direction towards heat. So somehow, irrational as it may seem, I always felt like I had no choice in the matter when turning on the shower and keeping it at cold. I wasn’t really choosing cold rather I am just stuck with less heat. However, today I found myself in front of a choice! I either move the knob to the left for heat or the right for cold. What shower actually gives you the option for making the shower colder? Anyways, I know my challenge so I had to move that freaking knob all the way to the right to no man’s land. Yes, I had to choose to make my shower as cold as possible. There was no hint or whisper of heat and I fully felt and appreciated the choice of choosing cold! And it was cold, I mean bone freezing, because I didn’t stop shaking until I was out of the shower. I can only compare it to my previous 4am shower which I remember as being icy cold.

My friend heard me since I probably let out a slight yelp but it was more me laughing at the height of the shower. Again, I am stuck with a shower head that is about a foot shorter than me. I told my friend about my challenge beforehand so it didn’t really surprise him. Also his reaction to my challenge was a little stronger than most since he said “I think people who take cold showers are stupid” (clean version). Not everyone understands my challenge which I think is a good thing. He had a good laugh at me and couldn’t understand why I was doing it. I of course went through the basics but what really caught my attention was that he said he would turn the shower cold at the end. I have been hearing this from numerous people, but I wonder how many of them actually do it. Its easy to say one thing but do another. They also seem to think that turning it cold after being hot is about the same as my challenge. This has made me come to realize that people won’t always understand my actions because they are looking through a narrow perspective. People love their hot showers, even adore them! To the extreme, that people can have bad days just because they were forced to take a cold shower by some unseen circumstance. I know it’s hard to take a cold shower but it shouldn’t ruin a person’s entire day.

Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often. ~ Mark Twain

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